New resolution

So, new year, new pages to be written and fresh, clean days to be filled.

The only resolution I did this year was a promise to myself to write more. Nothing else. Otherwise it would have been the usual stuff that I say to myself year after year and remain unfulfilled, year after year. Do you do that as well?

Why do we do it to ourselves?  We make our self look like we failed when in actual fact we have accomplished so much over the year, done so much to be proud of, but we only look back on the promise we made at midnight, usually a little tipsy, and most definitely very tired, to base our year on.

So what if you didn’t lose those few pounds, but you graduated from college with really good marks. Who cares if you didn’t go to the gym religiously 3 times a week, but you helped so many people with love and compassion. Does it really matter if you didn’t get the promotion for working 100 hours a week because you chose instead to spend those extra hours with your family and spent precious time with your children. These things mean more in the future and the year ahead surely?

So, new resolution…… something more for me and my family than before. What do you really want to happen in 2018?

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Testimony

I was fascinated watching Doctor Who from the Christmas 2017 episode. It was a weepy for all who have followed the Doctor for the decades he has been time travelling and saving Earthlings from various alien invaders and Daleks. This episode was introducing the next in line of Doctors and adding a very PC, but brilliant choice of new traveller.

The ‘Testimony’, were from billions of years in the future and went through time collecting memories from everyone at the point of death, so that person lived on in the form of shape shifters, who could become anyone who had ever lived throughout space and time. The thinking was, that people’s memories were who they were, and were important enough to make the massive jumps through history to collect them before they disappeared with the person’s last breath.

It was a very good and thought provoking episode. They were basically talking about our souls, the essence of who we are as a person, as human beings on the giant plant in a giant solar system of other just as giant planets and moons. Our memories contain who we are, have been and who we ended up becoming. Our memories make us and keep us going forward. They show what we are saved from, who we loved and our personal memories of who we also have lost over our lives. Our memories keep others alive inside us, good or bad, pets we have loved, teachers we remember for the help they gave. Our memories are everything we have at the end, and the memories we make are so important not just to us, but those we live with or just meet on a day to day basis.

Some of us have extremely bad memories from childhoods we prefer not to have in the memory bank in our heads. They also make us who we are today, and can help us know what we do not want to become. We might want to be better parents than our own, become social workers,  teachers, doctors, anyone who was less than the best in a striving to help the next generation not go through something we ourselves went through. Yes, it was awful for us, but it won’t be for another child along the line, maybe even our own, we will make it better for someone out there. It’s then that I can see the gift of memories. They change people. They make better and better people and situations out of what has gone before.

This is what I see is Testimony. This is what we leave behind.

Christmas again?

I know I’m getting older, and I don’t mean my age, but by how quickly each end of year comes round. No-one told me that once I became a “proper” adult, that most of the excitement of the Christmas season would disappear, replaced with manic stress, crowd pushing, trolley diving chaos.

Don’t get me wrong, I still love the whole of this season. I love the lights and music. There is a feeling that we all get at Christmas that can’t be put into words, it’s just there and has been for as long as we can remember. Once we get to the big day and all stuffed and feeling slightly more chubby than when we woke up, I have a sense of regret that I allowed stress to get in the way of my enjoying what this last month of the year brings. Another year that I let other stuff invade all the emotions and excitement.

Well, I tell myself, not next year, not again.

I want to be with my children, my hubby, my cats, my family and just be. Just taking some time to enjoy those around me and time that I can spend with them.

What better time of the year is there that I can do all this? The time where we think of each other, want to give to each person we love, think of Christ and why He came, celebrate and rejoice.

Coming and going

This is how it feels my head has been this last couple of months. It’s been busy in a good way, but has meant that I have been a bit abcent from Word press for which I am sorry. But…..

I am so excited to tell you all that I have spent time writing my first devotional 21 day book! I am releasing it as a Kindle ebook and should be available soon. I am keeping the price low to make it as affordable as possible. 

I will let you know as soon as it is available and will try to link it through my page. 

It has given me some new perspectives on things while writing. Giving a lot more thought to what I am putting down in my notes and my pages, has had made me think so much more about my own head and what others see in me. Do I care or should I care? Should I only care about what God sees? 

Thank you to all who have supported me on this journey, and all the lovely messages I gave received. They mean so much to me. 

Blessings to you all.

Butterfly

How beautiful are butterflies? Their gorgeous wings all the different colours of nature. So delicate and light as they float from one flower to the other. All the many colours and sizes. Amazing.

I think they are such a beautiful sight. But, the little butterfly doesn’t see itself as beautiful, if it even cares about what it looks like. Does it see the colours? Does it see the beauty that everyone else sees?

Are you like the butterfly? Beautiful but can’t see it? All around you can see your beauty, you seem to look in a different mirror or look through clouded glasses. Walk your life journey without realising how stunning and colourful you are. All who have their lives touched by your quiet spirit will remember it. 

You are beautiful. More than butterflies. No one is like you. You are bought by the King of Kings. He has clothed you in His glory. 

Slumber?

So I got to thinking overnight about all that was happening in the world and how many people were living in the hold of terror and fear. There are so many attacks, wars and hurting on Earth that it’s a bit of a daunting task to even pray for them all never mind wonder what they are going through. It’s also very easy to forget about it all when we can turn off the news or turn the page of the newspaper. They can disappear, blurred by the next celebrity scandal or weather report. We live cushioned lives mostly in the western world in this regard. We do have attacks as we saw in the UK over the last month. We can see some horrible stuff within the western world for sure, but how quick do we move on?

It can feel like God is not watching or has closed His ears to the desperate cries from His people. There are prayers around the world going on even as I write this for those who are hurting or who have lost everything. Is God looking and listening to something else? Has He even noticed?

The bible says that God never slumbers or sleeps. He is ever watching us and He hears every prayer. The book of Revelation tells us that every prayer or cry to God rises up like incense and God breathes it in. No prayer goes unheard. No prayer actually goes unanswered. It might not be the answer we were hoping or desiring to hear, but there will be an answer there if we are open to receive it. 

There is no real answer as to why God hasn’t stepped in and stopped things from happening. All I think about is the last time God stepped in to change the way the world was going, meant we had the flood in Genesis which destroyed everything.  So is that the only way He can stop events? Take away free will? Stop sins consequences? 

I really don’t know. These are just my thoughts and ramblings. I just know I have to trust God and know He is in full control of my future and the events which impact me and those I love and pray for. That’s all I take my rest in and knowing I can slumber and be confident in the knowledge that God never does.

Glitter?

Anyone who knows me, also knows my love for all things beauty and all things glitter. I love make up and how creative and artsy we can be with it and the confidence it can create. It is the subject of many quips within my family over the amount of make up I have accumilated over the years! Ahem…. there may be a fair bit, but I am not owning up to anything!!!

It also saddens me to still see in 2017 body and makeup shaming towards both men and women. This is a seriously outdated and extremely old fashioned way of thinking, and needs to be stopped. No one has the right to condemn or judge anyone for looks or body shape. It is nasty, horrible and very disrespectful.

I am happy with how I look and me in my own skin. I love my face, my eyes, my nose, even my brows which seem to be unrelated to each other! I do not use make up to conceal who I am, but to create different looks which mostly work, and sometimes dont. Thats the beauty (pun intended!) of makeup. And I belive it is ungendered.

How can we love our neighbour when we cant love ourselves? How can we love ourselves when we are putting each other down all the time? How can society learn to love each other with disrespect and hate for what is different to others everywhere we look? How can the church be a welcoming place when we accept that this happens within our buildings? Are we blind enough to think its not happening around us?

I have wanted to bring my boys up with respect for all, and I think we have acheived it as a whole. I dont want to hear shaming of anyone near me, and my house is a body shaming exclusion zone. We are all created equal, and in Gods image, so who has the right to call another? No one thats who. Not one person has the right to pull down another. Not one.

I hope this subject is brought to the front more in media and social media circles so it can be made unacceptable. Because it is.

I am not going to stop wearing makeup, and neither should anyone else who wants to. I am beautiful in my husband and Gods eyes. Thats all that matters to me, not any unjustified and undignified comments from people who have an opinion of what they think they should be seeing.

God loves all for who they are right now. So why dont we?

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